It seems like I’m always running behind when it comes to my writing. Not necessarily with the writing itself, but with the stuff around it. What is the stuff around it?
It’s getting the handwritten words from the page into the computer. It’s getting the teaser copy written. Formatting the text into book formatting. Covers and photos.
Sometimes it’s getting on the computer at all. And that’s strange. Both my desktop and laptop are easy to get to and work just fine. But I just don’t want to.
Maybe it’s that I’m on a computer all day (or night, since I’m currently on swing shift). Maybe I’m subconsciously procrastinating. I’m not making things any easier on myself , that’s a certainty. I’m still writing – just doing it longhand. So the stack of stuff that needs to go into the computer is just getting higher.
I need to get better with dictation. That’s going to get the words into the computer fastest. But it involves sitting at the computer. And it’s not putting new words on the page. I’m not sure why that part is so important. I just know it feels like it is. It’s an excuse that sounds plausible and reasonable.
I know I’m putting these obstacles in my own way. The answer should be to just stop putting them there. But I’m not doing it consciously. So I don’t realize I’ve done it until later.
I think I need to figure out why I’m doing it. Is it fear of failure? Fear of success? Imposter syndrome? Maybe a bit of all three? And how do I recognize it earlier, before I put the obstacle squarely in my path?
Maybe I just need to start. To set a small goal – 15 or 30 minutes aof dictating or revision each day – or even every other day. Looking at it, it doesn’t seem like it will make much difference. Then again, each little bit that gets done is less in the building stack, less pressure.
It’s a start. It’s building a routine. And it certainly can’t hurt.